Job Description: Rock God, Graphic Artist, Persain Poppinjay: Paints decorative freehand designs on objects, such as record covers, cigarette cases, lycra catsuits and lampshades, using handbrushes: beading and glittery things. Expert in poncing and fluffing. Skilled in creation of catuits.
Wise in the ways of interior design and will not tolerate things that doeth clash.
Face painting, balloon artistry, removeable tatoos, available for childrens birthday parties on request.
Heavenly Father of glitter, gorgeousness and glam. Creates birds capable of target shitting.
Designed the interior of the ark, and created all things stylish.
Career Goals:Stripper
Roger the Divine
All Things Too Damn Pretty, Lord Of The Tiger Pants, Creator Of Rhythm.
Job Description: Rock God, Biologist, Sex Symbol and Dentist: Very particular about dental hygiene, partners must floss before 'knowing'. Inventor of dental floss.
Creator of the thong, tiger pants.
Lives the life of a Rock God with much enthusiasm and charisma.
Sayeth much, gifted in the art of spaking.
Art blondeth and doeth hath more fun.
Created the first ever drum kit from coconuts.
Gifted scriber of letters of complainteth.
Career Goals:Would prefer gynaecology
John the Mysterious
God Of:All Things Mystifying And Curious, Lord Of Fertility
Job Description: Rock God, Strongeth and Silent Type, Electronic Whizz: Adjusts, installs, tests, and repairs high powered musical audio equipment and mobile radio transmitting equipment, using handtools and can follow wiring diagrams, which impresseth fellow Gods:
Enjoys bugging telephones and putting recording devices in toilets.
Listens to radio range station at frequent intervals (radio ga ga) during broadcasts to detect flaws in transmission and adjusts controls to eliminate flaws.
Invented circuit analyzers, audiometers and voltmeters using old bottle tops and pipe cleaners.
Repairs components of radio transmitting equipment and intercommunication telephone system, using handtools, hacks internet websites and creates viruses just for the hell of it.
Accounting wizard, manageth the donation plate.
Referee of other Gods hissy fits, useth much logic
Radiotelegraph Operator, can send confusing signals to stuff up the theories of Brian the Wise and does enjoy that.
Does not share the dress sense of fellow Gods but prefers yellow shorts.
Creator of lots of useful stuff, including the bass guitar, amps and pipe cleaners.
Career Goals: None really, desireth to retire and disappear thither yonder unto the mountains.
Brian the Wise
God Of: Rock God, Astonomer, Cosmotologist, Doctor, Boffin
Job Description: Lives in Another World most of the passing of the great ball of fire.
Observes and interprets celestial phenomena and relates research to basic scientific
knowledge or to practical problems, such as navigation and world peace:
Invented the telescope using empty Coke cans. (Pepsi ones sucketh)
Studies celestial phenomena by means of optical, radio, or other telescopes, equipped with
such devices as cameras, spectrometers, radiometers, photometers, and micrometers, which
may either be on ground or carried above atmosphere with balloons, rockets, pod-racers,satellites, or
space probes.
Proficient in the use of Adobeth Photoshop, createth rainbows.
Interprets messages from Mars.
Determines sizes, shapes, brightness, spectra, and motions, and computes positions of sun,
moon, planets, stars, nebulae, rainbows, galaxies and Darth Vader.
Calculates orbits of various celestial bodies.
Determines exact time by celestial observations, and conducts research into relationships
between time and space, much to the amusement of other Gods.
Develops mathematical tables giving positions of sun, moon, planets, and stars at given
times for use by air and sea navigators. Hovers dangerously close to breakething of one of the ten or so commandments - Thou shalt not be boring!
Studies history, structure, extent, and evolution of stars, stellar systems, rainbows and
universe.
Creator of day time soap operas.
Inventor of hair gel, styling mousse and the 'fro'.
Designed the fro comb and suggested the comb over for balding men.
Designer of loud shirts.
Creator of fish.
Career Goals: Many and varied. World Peace. World Domination. World
education. To save the whales. To get into the Guiness Book Of Records for the
worlds most perfect rainbow in Adobe Photoshop. To rain hellfire and brimstone down
upon the worlds media (especially the British) and rid the planet of them forevermore.