Attention: Brian the Wise
CC: Roger the Divine
Re: Wembley-eth Stadium

Lo!
Wembleyeth Stadium doth suck! It needeth screens.

Signeth: Crack Production Team

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Attention: Crack Production Team
Re: Wembley-eth Stadium

How much wilst it cost?

Signeth: Brian the Wise

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Attention: Brian the Wise
CC: Roger the Divine
Re: Wembleyeth Stadium

Lo! 'Twill cost a packet.

Signeth: Crack Production Team

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Attention: Crack Production Team
Re: Wembleyeth Stadium

Lo! We art nay spending that much for-eth screens. We art tighter than an Albacore Tunas Arsehole. Stuff the audience. We wilst thusly blame-eth the stadium whence they complain.

Signeth: Brian the Wise

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Attention: Brian the Wise
CC: Roger the Divine
Re: Wembleyeth Stadium

That doth suck! What about Thou fans? They art paying big money for-eth thou tickets!

Signeth: Crack Production Team

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Attention: Crack Production Team
Re: Wembleyeth Stadium

Shut-eth up and go-eth away!

Signeth: Brian the Wise
PS: Stop-eth CCing Roger the Divine. He ne'er readeth of emails.

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Attention: Brian the Wise
Re: Name-eth Change By Deed Poll

All relevant paperwork and scribings for the name-eth change from BHMayler unto B H The Wise hath now been completeth and art forwarded unto Thee via Express Carrier Pidgeon this morn.

Signeth: P Pusher

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Attention: Pope-eth John Paul Whoever Thou Art
Re: Pontificating Papalness

I, Brian the Wise, art verily interested in becomething the next Pope. Thou thoughts on this wouldst be-eth verily much appreciated.

Signeth: Brian the Wise

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Attention: CEO of The White House
Washington USA
Re: Presidency

I, Brian the Wise art contemplatething running for office. Couldst thou forward unto Thee an application form.

Signeth: Brian the Wise

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Attention: Brian the Wise
CC: Roger the Divine
Re: Paul-eth Rodgers

Please be-eth advised that Paul-eth Rodgers art a nasty bastard with a verily huge ego.
Thou art thusly adviseth against touring with him.

Signeth: Those In The Biz

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Attention: Censaur
Re: Concert Tour

We art not doing it for-eth the money!

Signeth: Brian the Wise

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Attention: Brian the Wise
Re: Cost of Rehearsal Room

This art costing us a fucking fortune!

Signeth: Roger the Divine

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Attention: Roger the Divine
Re: Cost of Rehearsal Room

Do-eth nay worry! We put-eth on a show upon the last day and chargeth the fans. That way they wilst thusly pay for-eth the cost!

Signeth: Brian the Wise

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Attention: Brian the Wise
Re: Cost of Rehearsal Room

That art a verily good idea-eth! Thee wilst haveth a Vodka to celebrate-eth!

Signeth: Roger the Divine

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Attention: Roger the Divine
Re: Thou last memo.

Thee haveth another verily good idea-eth. Thee wilst offer the Fan Club tickets and pretend-eth that it art a verily good price. Those suckers wilst jump-eth at the chance and ne'er realise We shouldst really give-eth them out for free.

Signeth: Brian the Wise

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Attention: Brian the Wise
Re: Whate'er Thou wert on about before.

Roger art too pisseth to answer Thee.

Signeth: Girlfriend Number 9438674934583845987609