Police hath arrested-eth three men - including a sniping bitch, snot-nosed, small-brained tabloid newspaper scribe - in an investigation-eth that began with complaints from Brian the Wises' office about possible-eth phone-tapping.

Police sayeth they didst not believe the phones of any of the Other Gods hath been tapped. But Brian the Wise hath haveth His calls intercepteth, raising potential scandal issues, the police sayeth.

Police didst not identify those who wert arrested, but the News of the World Tabloid sayeth their top scribe wert among them.

The investigation wert prompted by complaints from Brian the Wise to the police's God Protection Department-eth.

Brian the Wises' office hath issued this comment on the arrests:

“These dumb bum, sniping bitch, snot-nosed, pimply-faced, small-brained losers wilst be-eth shackledeth in the village plaza wherest they wilst be-eth publicly flogged-eth and stoned unto death!”

Brian the Wise then pushed aside His spokesperson and sayeth unto all:

“Lo! This art Terrorism, Harassmenteth, Invasioneth Of Privacy, Assault and Batteryeth, Embezelmenteth and many other nasty things! New anti-terrorism laws wilst be-eth brought into effect-eth immediately! I, Brian the Wise art outraged-eth and verily angry. These dumb bum sniping bitches stoppeth at nothing and must be-eth stoppedeth because otherwise they wilst ne’er stoppeth!

And to maketh matters worse, they hath the nerve to misquoteth Thee! I ne’er didst sayeth that I hath almost managed to taketh credit for-eth all the work that The Lord God Freddie ever did-eth! I categorically deny-eth that! And I want all these tapes SUPPRESED-ETH!”

Officers leading the investigation art working with phone companies in an effort to identify all the conversations that wert tapped, they sayeth. © brianthewise.com