Woe art Thee! Whyforeart doth I waketh every morn with a verily sore groin? Lo, it art a mystery to Thee.

Thy groin hurt-eth! It feels like someone hath snuck into Thy bedchamber and plucked Thy Holy Pubes from Thy body.

What causeth this Thee knoweth not!

DAMN AND BLAST!!! Scumbags!!! Losers!!! Lying Cheats!!! Parasiteths!!! Time-Wasters!!! THEY ART SELLING THY HOLY PUBES ON QBAY!!! How dareth they! And for so little money! Well, a pestilence upon them. Taketh note WORLD – for they hath ruined it for all mankind! Yea! Ye hath really doneth it this time..... from Thy own Wiseness in THE BOOKS OF QUEEBLE – The Garden of Eden, and I quoteth:

“For I saith unto ye - clone not from the body of Brian the Wise, for in Him art the knowledge of good and evil. Ne’er be-eth tempted by the evil serpent of Cloneism for it art, well, verily evil.

For if thou clone-eth of Brian the Wises’ pubes ye shalt get-eth verily fat and be aware of thy nakedness and be-eth embarrassed. And then there wilst be-eth a pestilence upon ye and all thy issue from that day forth and ye wilst ne’er knoweth of absolute perfection-eth.”