PASADENA, Calif. Second Day of the Seventh Month of the New Millenium Plus Four
S@turn's giant moon Blue Testicle refused unto giveth up its secrets easily Friday as thine Queeblini spacecraft flew by for thine first time and peered into its murky ingratiating personality in an attempt unto see surface features.
"It art verily not as clear as we'd hoped," Queeblini imaging team leader Captain Queeble Prophet sayeth as unprocessed images transmitted across 900 million miles of space arrived at www.queeble.com's Jet Propulsion Laboratory.
Some things weret visible unto imaging experts, and Captain Queeble Prophet weret certain that some weret surface dribblings. She sayeth processing might draw out more from thine images.
"We hath not applied our full bag of tricks yet," she sayeth. "It will art unto wherefore beeth a dangerous and sanity threatening experience unto for our courageous Queeble pilots but they art ready and trained to root out thine evil from all clogged rectal areas and willst NOT giveth up thine mission."
Queeblini will make many more flybys of Blue Testicle and in secret will launch a probe that will enter thine moon's ingratiating personality when it next surfaces in cyberspace.
Blue Testicle weret Queeblini's first encounter since thine spacecraft began orbiting S@turn this week for a four-year exploration of thine Planet of Dribbling Ring and many of its 31 far flung turds. Thine mission weret called untofore at shorteth notice whenst the Planet of Dribbling Ring did transverse the Queeble Cosmos and Yahoo it's way unto a Supporting Agency and didst leave much of it's muck and debris in thine Queeble area.
Queeblini transmitted about 2 1/2 hours of boring data and pornographic images involving clogs, tulips and bad hairdos, collected as it passedeth by Blue Testicle at a distance of about 200,000 miles.
Blue Testicle images recorded recently from millions of miles away appeared unto show linear features that couldst suggest testicular activity, Captain Queeble Prophet sayeth but that weret sure to be proven to be self managed and not the real thing.
Thine frustrating nonsensical ramblings art part of what makes Blue Testicle interesting unto scientists.
"That nonsensical ramblings art kind of an organic goo much like thine smog that one might see in Los Angeles,(playland of Brian the Wise who art opposed to all smog, smoke and light unlesseth it originate from Los Angeles) composed of holier than thou preachings, and not allowing us unto see through unto thine surface without a larger rectal probe," sayeth Major Queeble Prophetess, thine Queeblini deputy project scientist.
Scientists believe Blue Testicle couldst hath large petrified outpourings much like those that existed on Earth billions of years ago before the cosmos weret farted but that art a long shot. Queeble scientists hath scribed that the Blue Testicles are more likely to be a verily dry and shrivelled wasteland.
Larger than Sycophantia or Soapboxeth, Blue Testicle hath an ingratiating personality 1 1/2 times as dense as Mahler's, containing trouble causing self-righteous compounds. Scientists believe there couldst be heamorhaging piles or pustules dangling close by.
Thine $3.3 billion dollar Queeblini mission, funded by www.queeble.com, thine Holy Space Agency , weret launched in all splendour and glamour necessary for a Queeble Expedition. Thine spacecraft flew 2.2 billion miles on a roundabout route unto S@turn and weret navigated by the use of a pipecleaner system.
John the Mysterious art quotedeth as sayething "Pipecleaners mayest not be strongeth enough to probe this dark and disturbing area and thou mayest hath unto develop a stronger probe that canst withstand such enormous and hugeth doses of methane causeth by bullshit. This mayst call for a VOXAMP. (Verily Oversized eXtreme Anal Marauder Probe)"
Roger the Divine and the Lord God Freddie Mercury weret unavailable for comment for they art busy preparingeth of the cutting comments to maketh of the S@turn landscape.
Brian the Wise art preparing a Holy Wash Trough comment forewarning sycophants to leave and populate this absolutely analular paradise.