Thou art indeed welcome in this house of worship and thou art also obviously lost but thou verily will now findeth thine way as thou doth learn of the Word According to Queen.

Bow thine head, my child, and open thine ears and thine eyes to the wonders of this tale.

Let us begin.

And it came to pass that the Disciples of the Gods grew ears and did harken to all manner of sounds and did move their heads in rhythm to those sounds and did shake their booties to the sounds and did worship thine own bodies while harkening to those sounds and did play air guitar when their parents told them thou wouldeth go blindeth doing that which the sounds caused them to doeth.

And the sounds came forth from all manner of places and did repeat thineselves in the minds of the disciples of the Gods whosoever where henceforth known as Fans and did cause sleeplessness and headaches and were blamed for poor scholastic results and did spawn sounds from other tribes of disciples of the Gods not known as Fans but wanting to now be known as the Tribute Bands.

And whilst the Fans and the Tribute Bands hearkened to the sounds, the sounds greweth and begatted into more sounds and more Fans were begatted whilst the sounds played in the darkness of the night just before the disciples fell asleep snoringeth and fartingeth.

And the world was filled with snoring, farting, masterbating air guitar players.

And the snoring, farting, masterbating air guitar players did come together... right now... into the lands known as Cyberspace and did snore and fart and masterbate together and did blame all their illogical and egotistical rantings and ravings on the sounds.

And the snoring, farting, masterbating air guitar players of Cyberspace did look to find a reason why society had rejectedeth them and did decide in unison to forevermore rejecteth that society which rejecteth them and which thou art now rejecting for rejection and to pulleth themselves together into the lands known as Sycophantia, in unison, and in secret and to take heed of those who dareth to call them Wankers, for Wankers is the word of Beezlebub and Beezlebub is not a Wanker and so Beezlebub shall be shunneth and banned from Wanker Cyberspace and from the lands of Sycophantia.

And so it came to pass that Soap was invented.

And it thence furthermoreth came to passeth that a Box was invented.

And it furthermoreth and down the tracketh came to pass that disciples of Soap and Boxes were pluckedeth from the tribes of snoring, farting, masterbating air guitar players of Fans and Sycophantia and Cyberspace and Tribute Bands and the pluckedeth were happy and joyous and did masterbate and snore and fart in delirium forevermoreth and with total disregard for logical and reasonable thought processes and did happily band together and create a tribe so powerful and so unique that no other person on earth dare to enter for fear of losing thine minds.

And the Gods of the Sounds were happy.

And on the Seventh Day the Gods of the Sounds created Royalties and did decide to play it for all it was worth with these tribes.

And so it was.

Stay seatedeth whilst the teachings of the Holy Queeble are cast upon thee.