Once I hearkened a story, which I knoweth not if it art true!
It saith, that Queen went unto the Sahara, and playeth a verily loud tune!
They trieth their new sound system and whence they playeth a note,
It bleweth them to Kingdom Come and scareth the local goat.
“Holy shit” saith The Lord God Fred for he hath ringing in His ears
That wouldst cause an earthquake-eth, turn it down thy dears!
“That doth ne’er do well with a hangover” poor Roger the Divine didst cry
For He didst hit the vodka in a big way only the previous nigh
“Well that was fucking awesome” declareth John and He wert verily proud
For it wert His little invention that doth maketh it so loud
“Whereforeart art Brian?” the Gods did thusly ask
For He hath disappeareth since that bloody almighty blast
“Behold! Art that His Y Fronts a’hanging in that tree?”
And they art striped with skidmarks, those dirty old neck to knees.
“Ha ha, ha ha, ha ha-eth” they laughed incredulously
“Brian the Wise hath shit Himself” they shouted out with glee.
And so the Urban Myth began and people from far and near
Telleth the story of the Sahara and the God who quaketh with fear
21 kilometres he ran afore he knew
That he wert completely starkers and his shit it ran like goo
And that art how it came to be for the one who bloweth orbs
Ashamed and afrighted he verily wert - and so from that day forward
He simply closed His butthole and refused to bloweth the bugle
And now he art anally retentive, grumpy, mean and frugal

David of Goliath

Davo!

That art NAY FUNNY! It art a lie - and curses, pestilences, wrath and much smiting upon whoe’er scribeth that!

Bastards!

I hope thou art not laughing.

Trash that immediately and doeth ne’er let it see the light of day.

Cheers,

(Almost Sir and Getting Impatient) Brian the Wise

© brianthewise